THE GOGGLES! THEY DO NAAATHING!

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Finally, a true christmas classic! Schwarzenegger shows the rest of the acting fraternity how its done. “It” being getting maced in the face and punching a reindeer.  Plus, Troy McClure tries to seduce his wife and there’s Sinbad the Postman to contend with in Jingle All The Way! Plus we talk about submarine thriller Black Sea and have a pleasant reminisce about childhood Christmases and Taylorson’s beloved typewriter. And if you’re a fan of terrible, terrible impressions, you’ve come to the right place. Merry Christmas everyone!

Download now via LibsyniTunes or Stitcher!

And! ANNNNND! If you love terrible Christmas movies, check out our compadres who are joining us in reviewing 15 Days of Bad Christmas Movies:

Stinker Madness – www.stinkermadness.com

Misan[trope]y – misantropey.com

Dark Corners – www.youtube.com/LondonComedyWriters

If We Made It – ifwemadit.blogspot.com

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They were definitely dead… but they came back to life!

Versus

Another week, another two films, another uncontrollable laughing fit that needs to be edited out of the podcast…First up this week it was a trip the cinema to see everyone’s favourite man-beast The Rock star as Hercules. But no ordinary Hercules, this is the film that debunks the myth by making the titular character less ‘son of a God’ and more ‘everyday Joe’. So I guess it is the ordinary Hercules. Like if Superman was just ‘Man’. Anyway, after that Jones’s knowledge of the aforementioned Dwayne Johnson is put to the test with 5 gruelling questions on the man formally known as Flex Kavana. Or was it Rip Bullwinkle? Or Shred Stevens? Then we move on THE VAULT. And this week its supernatural undead yakuza action horror fantasy nonsense Versus. So, find a clearing in a forest, watch the dead rise, kill them again, eat a heart, punch a hole clean through a man’s head, run away, come back, pay no attention to continuity or a structured narrative and achieve all of this on e budget of around 11p before DOWNLOADING THE JT MOVIE PODCAST, EPISODE 61, NOW!

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How much does your life weigh?

Up in the Air http://teaser-trailer.com

Sixty episodes? Its a veritable diamond jubilee. And where better to celebrate than by the Tees, for another outdoor podcasting adventure. Dodging ice cream vans and a large dog that I had to edit out of the podcast, the chaps discuss The Vault film first, with Jones having chose the George Clooney dramady Up In The Air. After that and a brief pondering of what an NHS exorcism would be like, the chaps head off to the cinema to see The Purge: Anarchy and later record there musings. So, grab a shotgun, plank-with-a-nail-in-it, garden scythe or whatever your favoured weapon of choice is before DOWNLOADING THE JT MOVIE PODCAST, EPISODE 60, NOW!

Click to listen via LibsyniTunes or Stitcher Radio!

‘Shake your Ass’… is he Moroccan?

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This week on the JT Movie Podcast there’s more than one divisive film thrown into the mix. But first up we take a trip to the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull via Cybertron to discuss the sequels and remakes we refuse to acknowledge. Then we take a look at Darren Aronofsky’s wet n’ wild Biblical epic Noah. Jones reviews 1987’s Wings of Desire. Taylorson then fires up the subtitles for Guillermo Del Toro’s The Devil’s Backbone. But THE BULK of the podcast is dedicated to the 2002 comedy drama About a Boy. So, live a life of blissful unemployment, get a bowl cut, deny killing that duck, fake a child, embrace capitalism and the stereotypical ideal of happiness and then put on performance for your peers that’s both pointless and cringe-worthy before DOWNLOADING THE JT MOVIE PODCAST, EPISODE 44, NOW!

Click to listen via LibsyniTunes or Stitcher Radio!

I don’t know about you, but I have an aversion to getting F.U.B.A.R.

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This week on the JT Movie Podcast, we’re in the slammer, trying desperately to avoid getting shivved in the showers. Twice. But first up there’s discussion on cinema’s finest tobacco-themed scenes. Then it’s out first trip to the lockup with gritty British drama Starred Up. Jones tries to compose himself during a review of Blue is the Warmest Colour and Taylorson plugs a gap in his cinematic viewing history with Blade Runner. But THE BULK of the podcast is dedicated to 1989 action bollocks Tango and Cash. So, break THAT jaw, get framed, hate litter, introduce your fiancé slinky, use your belt for more than just holding up your pants, escape in drag, don’t put a scratch on it, build a mice-maze desk and invest in a self-destructing villainous warehouse before DOWNLOADING THE JT MOVIE PODCAST, EPISODE 42, NOW!

Click to listen via LibsyniTunes or Stitcher Radio!

You have to say to yourself, “Albert, you pierced the toast, so what?!”

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This week on the JT Movie Podcast, we’re not wearing shoes, because they make us fall down. There’s a lengthy look back at films that traumatised us as children (including a quite remarkable Transformers: The Movie breakdown from Mr Jones). Then there are reviews of the good-but-it-could-have-been-great Out Of The Furnace, the shite Deathstalker and the notoriously shite Troll 2. There’s a look back at 1980s British nuclear disaster horror Threads, and the last in the epic 1970s aeronautical disaster series with The Concorde: Airport ’79. But THE BULK of the podcast is dedicated to the 1996 farcical comedy The Birdcage. So, don your best wig, put up a crucifix, ask how ‘bout those Dolphins, put out your best raunchy crockery, fill it with Guatemalan Peasant Soup, avoid political scandal and deliver a monologue about all the colours before DOWNLOADING THE JT MOVIE PODCAST, EPISODE 35, NOW!!

Click to listen via LibsyniTunes or Stitcher Radio!

Just let your soul glow baby, feeling oh-so-silky smooth!

ComingToAmerica

It’s another long ‘un this week on the JT Movie Podcast. First the chaps discuss their audacious double-header at the multiplex this week when they caught back-to-back screenings of 12 Years a Slave and American Hustle. With the nominations just announced, there’s some Oscar-banter before reviews of the latest adaptation of nouveau-riche yarn The Great Gatsby, sensitive female running drama Personal Best, 70s disaster classic Earthquake and singing-nun aviation nightmare Airport 1975. But THE BULK of the podcast is dedicated to 1988 comedy classic Coming To America. So, awaken to an orchestral alarm clock, walk on rose petals, travel to Queens, find out Joe Louis was 137 years old, disarm Samuel L. Jackson with a mop, declare IN THE FACE at a sporting event and hand an elderly stranger a pair of $500,000 earrings before DOWNLOADING THE JT MOVIE PODCAST, EPISODE 32, NOW!

Click to listen via LibsyniTunes or Stitcher Radio!